Thar' Be Light Matey

The other day, we were walking to your classroom.  You looked up at me, mid-stride, and simply stated that you loved me.  We both kept walking. I asked you, “What did you say?”  This time you looked up at me and said again, “I love you Daddy.” I tried to think of something that I had bought you recently.  Was it the gingerbread house I bought you at Trader Joe’s?  No, you already thanked me for that days ago. What prompted this spontaneous expression of appreciation?  There had to be some sort of cause for this, right?  I asked you why you said that and if everything was 'ok'.  I was acting like I didn’t know.

When you were born, the day you were born, your presence was clear.  Who you were, where you came from and what you were part of was ‘known’. It was obvious. You were absolutely filled with wonder and appreciation.  You were fearless and adventurous. Your presence was “it”.  It was completely motivating for your mother and I. Since you couldn’t do much with your little Jello body, laying there smiling was literally all you could do….and it captivated whole rooms. That energy, that beauty, that force is still you, as you evidenced to me the other day on our walk to your class.  You are still that unconditional beam of light.

This world, in its’ endeavor to show you all the things you are not, will appear to be urging you to become like itself.  With its’ expressions of fear, anger and confusion it will feel as if it is pulling you nearer and nearer to itself.  In the living of my own life I have found myself slipping and sometimes intending those shadows.  I eventually determined, perhaps I should say I eventually remembered, that I was more than all the things I saw around me.  I remembered that I was that beautiful force too.

As I get older, I am 46 now, I am slowly coming around to a basic premise that I used to hold as a self-evident truth; we are light.  We are creatures of light and love.  It is our basic nature, THEY are our base instincts.  As you brought forth this truth with your simple, supple little newborn body in January of 2010, you brought it forth four days ago.  It is still who you are.  It will always be who you are. Happy Birthday Owen! Thank you and I love you too.